catching up

"Even if we know in our hearts that something is the right thing to do, it's still damn scary if we're the only ones doing it. Ultimately though, the thing we're really most afraid of is nothing more than looking foolish." Just got that off a website sent to me by a friend:

http://www.freewayblogger.com/visitorsgallery.htm

I'm back from 3 weeks in Kenya -- now what has the media's attention is the conflict in the Middle East between Israel and Lebanon. It's an awful story, that began while I was away. But the awfulness in Iraq continues.

I hear my thesis advisor is recovering from his complications of appendicitis, and I keep mulling over my thesis in my head: "How My God Was Limited in Seminary" -- but it's more than the limits, it's also the God of the gaps -- how we let God fill in for what we don't know or don't understand. I wonder if feeling foolish (see above) is part of a gap we perceive within ourselves, a gap between us and our own integrity, a gap between us and "normal" or "sane" or "mainstream" people.

My kids survived fine in my absence; my husband and I are still separated; now my nearly-72-year-old dad is in the hospital with a variety of ailments (mom, the brain cancer survivor, is now the strong one); I have a sermon to prepare for this Sunday; still unpacking, and to complicate matters, am painting my livingroom walls (and have strained my lower back moving furniture!). The Kenyan church is going strong (growing) and the country's infrastructure is improving. That's my summary of life at the moment.